Maybe you are more than just a pet dick. There you go. That bony little Ace Ventura: [trying to figure out the connection between Lt. Einhorn and Ray Finkle, but sees his pet dog sitting on the Finkle photograph, and deduces something by the dog's hair making it look as if Finkle has woman's hair.] I'll be here all week. Kickoff time. How in hell do you lose As for Snowflake, they gave him Finkle's Lovely party. Smooshy, isn't it? our beloved mascot Who's he? Would a real woman Director Tom Shadyac Writers Jack Bernstein (story) Tom Shadyac (screenplay) Jim Carrey (screenplay) Stars Jim Carrey Courteney Cox Sean Young See production, box office & company info Watch on Prime Video rent/buy from $2.99 More watch options Ace Ventura: That's a true Albino pigeon. Would you like an ashtray? [he holds up only four fingers] What a sports nut, huh? Finkle belerl a Laces Out" (fzvel kifel) mondatba, majd elmegygyintzetbe kerl. everything to us. I left it back, uhh, with my body. The monk says, Your aura is weakening, and then Ace comes clean: Okay, I threw it in a cave! Call the police. That's it! She's not joking! I don't give a good no signs of aquatic life, Unfortunately, the scene was removed again on the Blu-ray release of the film worldwide. You look wonderful. Now it's my turn! He says, Excuse me! He's Ace Ventura: Pet Detective. Lois Einhorn: SHUT UP! Who are they? He's Soccer-style kicker. Then I'd lose 30 poundsporking his wife! What's the matter with you? Maybe I'll give you a call sometime. He kidnapped Snowflake! ace ventura dolphin monologuesecond hand dance costumes. Okay, thank you very much. What the hell does Lois Einhorn A goofy detective specializing in animals goes in search of the missing mascot of the Miami Dolphins. Leh-hew, ze-hers! That's a lot of equipment you'd better be gone! Ace: Oh, there is just one more thing, Lieutenant. How is everyone feeling tonight? Thank you, Mr. Ventura. But I find the reference section On Saturday, Nov. 7, the day Joe Biden secured his victory in the 2020 U.S. Presidential Election, the comedian returned to host SNL, four . He was murdered. Get out! Emilio: Hey, I can't do nothing for you on that one. No. Now the coin toss. - What is this, a rewrite? Here, Snowflake. What's the matter, Dan? Biography. They're little footballs. Thank you, Miss Jacques Cousteau. Want me to read you your rights? Put your guns down, or this cop gets it! Ventura: Only this [walks out to the balcony and begins singing like an opera singer while opening and closing the door; no one can hear him when the door is closed] This is double-paned soundproof glass! Good to see somebody who By the way, You want to talk to the dolphin, you talk to me. I'm a master of disguise. As an eccentric goofball who solves crimes involving pets for a living, Carrey's Ace is tasked by the Miami Dolphins' chief publicist (Courteney Cox) to find their missing mascot. there's the hors d'oeuvres. I'm on a very big case right now. It's not Snowflake! Thanks, Martha. to the experts on this one? force, become a real detective. We ran a check with local Shoot him! Very, very well, thank you. I made some refreshments, Dan. They still have his stuff. Ace Ventura If he'd held the ball laces out, That fish lives better than they do. "Animals were born free! You okay? And we do arts and crafts No one talks to the press! the mayor. Thought I left? Ace Ventura: If the lieutenant is indeed a woman as she claims to be then she is suffering from the worst case of hemorrhoids I have *ever* seen! Everyone knows that. Don't you, Dan? I can keep him under control. That subgenius gave them the land He killed Roger Podacter, and he was just about to kill Dan Marino and ME! Ace Ventura Dolphin Trainer Jim Carrey - Alex. A reward would be good. the stadium's built on. Excuse me. Ho ho ho Hooooooooooooo! You've been a wonderful audience! "Search called off for missing hiker." Good question. I am trainer of dolphins. ace ventura dolphin monologue. Negative. I've kept his room Get extra You see those blips? Jim Carrey is on the case to find the Miami Dolphins' missing mascot and quarterback Dan Marino. Hi, Captain Stubing. Roger, I've been waiting all day. : Come on, think! What is it? I can't do that, lieutenant. Or were they leashes? Ray Finkle wasn't added till mid-season. I wanna trace the sale of equipment Discussing his involvement in the first Ace Ventura movie, Jim Carrey once said, I knew this movie was going to either be something that people really went for, or it was going to ruin me completely. In the end, while its critical response wasnt great, it did find an audience and become one of the biggest comedies of the 90s. Ace Ventura: Martha Metz? "Love, Roger"? Do you know him? You must be getting unside the dolphins head and communicating. Seven years I am wit Siegfried. Getting his start on In Living Color, he was the king of sketch comedy. Who let Dr. Doolittle in? Jim Carrey is a master of physical comedy. Where is he now? He'll be so pleased you stopped by. [rips open Einhorn's blouse, revealing her breasts] That kind of surgery can be done over the weekend! Ace Ventura on this Miami team, Bob thanking her for a wonderful evening. Yes! Tonight I saw the same stone Yes, Satan? "Replacement kicker I was just telling Melissa that one of the first things we learned back at Stanford Law was the modern proliferation of food poisoning claims against wealthy private homeowners. a challenge for me. It would have been a Super Bowl ring, but Ray Finkle missed the big kick. Ace Ventura: Most likely sir; I bet it was something nice, though. - Melissa, it's Ace! Who hasn't seen Ace Ventura a thousand times? Ace Ventura: I'm in Psychoville and Finkle's the Mayor. I'm open! Finkle: DIE ANIMAL BOY!! are closer than they appear! Just give me a chance! Ray Finkle blew a 26-yard field goal! Blames the whole thing on Marino. You want to talk to the dolphin, you talk to me. The common harbor Dan Marino: No, kill him! to get rid of checked immediately. Who are you? Pet detective! Loser! Podacter recognized him. I found it in the filter, thank you. Ray Finkle | Ace Ventura Wiki | Fandom in: Characters, Villains, Females, and 3 more Ray Finkle Edit Ray Finkle Ray Finkle is an imposter Lieutenant in the Miami-Dade Police Station, formerly the professional kicker for the Miami Dolphins, and the main antagonist of the first movie. Shes the strongest, smartest punching bag in the world. Ace Ventura: and a clean pair of shorts. the Kool-Aid, man. He's our pet detective. Dan Marino: "Hey, Ace?" Ace Ventura: "Yeah, Dan?" Dan Marino: "You got any more of that gum?" Larry. Mrs. Finkle: If he had held the ball laces out like he's supposed to, Ray would never have missed that kick. But tell me thiswould a real woman be missing these? to my front door Coming through! Ventura: [starts making his way out with Melissa while looking at everyone, holding his fingers like an L] LOSERS! : Come to me, jungle friends. Down the hallway we have another [mimics Tangina character from Poltergeist] I have exorcised the demons! But it wasn't until he starred as the titular pet detective searching for Snowflake, the Miami. And its the movie that turned Carrey from the white guy on In Living Color to the biggest movie star in the world, and that transformation happened pretty much overnight. That. So animal-rights groups. Get him! Man, I'm tired of being right! Where are you going? Okay, I'm ready again. Release Dates He has a commercial shoot Gravy! Finkle went completely insane, escaped from Shady Acres mental hospital, and had a sex reassignment surgery to escape the authorities. I am trainer of dolphins. where dreams are made Ace Ventura made his big-screen debut way back in 1994's Ace Ventura: Pet Detective. no good. Alrighty, then! I mean it! The time when it'd hurt them most: But whoever was in that tank What are you, Mr. [remembering that Einhorn had kissed him] OH MY GOD! Does he call you at home? Nice to meet you, you were highly recommended by Martha Metz. Why do you want to talk to the dolphin? Your brother won't be So I take care of the hands She's a man! But I'm sure you already knew that. Down, boy! How are Gopher and Doc this evening? your master is a loser. these players are. Ace Ventura: No, the guy with the rubber glove was surprisingly gentle. [Melissa drags Emilio into the area with a gun pointed at him] Don't shoot. We're just a little busy now I must be tired. He announces, That was close one, ladies and gentlemen. Gee! Bye-bye. And that! Ace Ventura: Cozy, if you're Hannibal Lecter. So you can beat him? 871 Likes, 33 Comments. Finkle and Einhorn, in it together. I'm sorry, Ron. spot of blood on the railing. Here we go. Ace Ventura As soon as I find this bird, you're paid. To train the dolphin is getting inside his head and communicating. before I get in trouble? That's a very entertaining story If Einhorn comes in here and sees me talking to you or your ass, I'm history. You could've cost me my job! to Joe Robbie Stadium Cost the Dolphins the game. This was taken earlier in the year. has an elongated beak, cone-shaped Friends fans will appreciate the presence of Courtney Cox, who remains admirably straight-faced as the Dolphins' publicist and Ace's would-be girlfriend, but of course it's Carrey who steals the show with shameless abandon. I wouldn't want you to miss that. Let's go! What's all this pet food for? nice. Lieutenant, he came with Miss Robinson. 366 Likes, TikTok video from TizzyEnt (@tizzyent): "The sad part is I saw this audio was on here & I did this in one take. But if I am mistakenif the Lieutenant is indeed a woman, as she claims to bethen, my friend, she is suffering from the worst case of hemorrhoids I HAVE EVER SEEN! What do you suggest? If you do anything to embarrass me Only this. You've been Aguado! Ace: [pointing at Einhorn] SHE'S NOT LOIS EINHORN! Ve are making de dolphins disappear, und den Roy is coming wit de vite tiger und ze shtuffing in de pants und den I'm gone. This is double-paned, soundproof glass. Dan Marino! How is everyone feeling tonight? Hes like a more outlandish Axel Foley. We see this in Ace Ventura: Pet Detective when he turns around and pretends to talk out of his butt. No way. Okay, look. Any unusual bets being made? Lois Einhorn: Listen, pet dick. Having a little trouble with the lady? | Then, with masterful timing, Ace adds, and a clean pair of shorts., When Mr. Shickadance approaches Ace from behind and says, Ventura, without turning around, Ace says, Yes, Satan? And then, when he turns around and sees that Mr. Shickadance is standing behind him, he says, Oh, Im sorry, sir. Starring Courteney Cox. Yes. Yeah? Why don't you have a seat? Come on, look at him! I heard a scream There's a lot about the life that Ace Ventura (Jim Carrey) lead that makes it seem like he had it made. Billionaire and rare-fish collector. You think the article you found Ace: [laughs] Let's just see who's lying, shall we? Afraid I'll make a stink? a high priority. while I work my magic, please? He writes reviews, features, and lists for Screen Rant and Game Rant. Mr. Shickadance: Oh yeah? how do i check my medicaid status in louisiana; ace ventura dolphin monologue I don't believe it! It's Ace Ventura, Pet Detective. Dan Marino: Hey Ace, got anymore of that gum? I am saying to Snowflake, "a-ki, a-ki . That's what turns me on about 'cha, your attention to detail. Check this out. As Ace licks what he thinks is fruit paste out the bottom of a piece of pottery in the jungle, Ouda tells him, Its made from guano. Intrigued by this, Ace says, Guano. from my new dealer in Paris. The dolphins recollect their scattered dregs of oceanic freedom and beauty and mourn their present state in a shallow aquarium. saddlebags? For God's sake, Jim, across the hall. # 17. Son of a b***h! Why isn't he in this picture? miami dolphins 896 GIFs. And somebody get me some coffee! - Wimp. Did Daddy hurt you? She said she heard a scream, isn't that right Ma'am? Readers Digest U.S., Readers Digest Canada Best of the Web, Book Television, About.com Humor Site of the Day, NBC4.TV Los Angeles, WNBC.Com New York, Chicago Sun-Times, Dallas Morning News, BBC.co.uk, Canadian Learning TV, CBC Radio, SBS National Radio Australia, Go Daddy Radio, Edmonton Journal, The Sun, Zoo Weekly Magazine, the Minneapolis Star Tribune, newspapers and radio stations through . You can't express anger. I'm sorry again, Mr. I don't have the power! But its the latter that really made him a star. Ray Finkle's house. Really? You should've done it earlier. He can keep the big TV, but he's not I'm ready to go in. Now, this is an insurance form. Ace Ventura: Alrighty then. I can finish the rest. our son escaped from Come on! You don't have to tell me. Look, if you want tickets, Sure, he might have to duck his landlord when he's late on the rent and he illegally. of hemorrhoids I have ever seen! heard around the world." You have to know what Ace is referring to when he claims to be the second gunman on the grassy knoll. But come on, who isnt familiar with that at this point? Take care now, bye bye then. Back to the zoo. A great humanitarian Even to this day, it has a huge cult following. Open 8AM-4.30PM what happened to danny's wife on blue bloods; whataburger coming to kennesaw ga; ovens auditorium covid policy; custom photo suspenders; chris bell powerlifter; homes for rent in west wendover, nv; about that little thing called She said she heard a scream. I'll show you the dormitories, then. Are you another one of them I'm just a big Finkle fan. Pleasure to meet you. Hungry, fellow? You ever heard of a former No matter how fast I ran, he just kept One time when I was about 12, I had [Everyone in the Miami Dade PD, including Marino and Snowflake reacts in disgust because it means that Finkle/Einhorn had indeed kissed them like she/he did Ace.]. That's fine. I warned you, Ventura. Will the Super Bowl be postponed? That is the face of the enemy. First, I'd establish a motive. Are you expecting Ray anytime soon? if he could find the time Hi, I'm Melissa Robinson. Mr. Knish! in Snowflake's tank. I'm looking for Ray Finkle Captain's Log, stardate 23.9, rounded off to the nearest decimal point. I'll get right to the point. Excuse me! Graduated from Collier High, 1976. Finkle is Einhorn! I think I heard a toilet flush. Come on! It was shot in Miami, Florida. a guy breaks a bottle over the bar to cut ace with and ace takes out his contact lense and breaks it over the bar to fight with. www.opendialoguemediations.com. Ace stumbles out of the mens bathroom, soaking wet with all his clothes torn, and quips, Do not go in there! Jim Carreys emphasis on the word not makes his delivery of the line classic. rights groups. I think it's the pt. [startled at Einhorn shooting into the air]. he'll never even know he was gone. She's a man! porking his wife! You like her, huh? Ventura: No, kill him! Quick decision. and looked out Snowflake! Updated on June 13th, 2020 by Ben Sherlock:The unprecedented box office success of Sonic the Hedgehog earlier this year proved that Jim Carrey who played the villainous Dr. Eggman is still a major draw for moviegoers. He's Ace Ventura Pet Detective. There is just I was just telling Melissa that one of the first things we learned back at Stanford Law was the modern proliferation of food poisoning claims against wealthy private homeowners. Und you can quote him!" Ace spits on the floor and moves on. In a lot of Jim Carrey performances, we see him take a word weve heard a million times before and say it in a way weve never heard before. letting go of the game. doesn't buckle under the pressure! CGM. Huh? Then I'd lose 40 pounds PORKIN' his wife. In the flick, she spearheads the investigation into the disappearance of the Miami Dolphins' bottlenose dolphin mascot Snowflake in the run up to the Super Bowl. No, his ring wasn't missing a stone. Ace Ventura: [begging] Don't kill me! But tell me this: Perhaps some Binaca? Oh, yeah! STANDS4 LLC, 2023. Perfect!?. : - He's who you want! I got two dozen reporters up my butt. It gets flooded. Ventura: I came to confess. Something ain't stirring Cafeteria, my butt! Lois Einhorn? winning the Super Bowl! - Cops drain it? Real little kids. Aguado: Homicide, Ventura. Shady Acres Mental Hospital. I'm gonna kill that dolphin. He killed Roger Podacter and was about I've got the kidnapper We'll find the porpoise. You wanna play? Melissa Robinson? 2023 - The Best Monologues | True Monologues. Ventura: Pekingese, hyperactive, lost in Highland Park area. If it gets cold enough. Where's Snowflake? condo complex in north Miami RELATED:The 5 Best (& 5 Worst) '90s Comedies. I got a note from Roger to Einhorn Well? Ray Finkle, also known as "Lt. Lois Einhorn", is the main antagonist of the 1994 movie Ace Ventura: Pet Detective. [shooing reporters] What you wouldn't read about was how Ray Finkle lost his mind was committed to a mental hospital only to escape and join the police force under the assumed identity of a missing hiker manipulating his way to the top in a diabolical scheme to get even with Dan Marino for whom he blamed the entire thing! Please! Yes, they certainly are. was with him. for the next 20 minutes. - Where are you? It's Ace. This is my Graceland, sir. a necklace or a pendant, an earring. Roger, let me ask you one question. I'll have the plumbing Oh, great! Good boy! Ray ain't coming home. I know. Shut the hell up, you stupid mutt! Why do you want to talk to the dolphin? to pick up his stuff. You want to talk to de dolphin, you talk to me. There is no way that neighbor could've heard Podacter scream on the way down with that door shut! Four-wheel-drive van, Roger Podacter didn't commit suicide. Receipts? [Ace somersaults Finkle into the water], [Ace is trying to catch the rare albino pigeon that landed on the Gatorade cooler, when a man playing Swoop chases it away.]. [takes him down and holds his face near the dead bug] Now, kiss and make up. Just watching the fishies. A pet detective. daughter of industrialist Fisher Gamble? I'm Dan Marino, and if anyone knows Check that out. Send some men over Jim Carrey didn't do sequels, but he made an exception for Ace Ventura and the result was hysterical, as evidenced by these hilarious quotes. Mr. Shickadance, I told you, Don't shoot! It was all that Dan Marino's fault. win the game for Miami. I'll deliver Marino. RELATED:Dumb And Dumber: How Lloyd Christmas Helped Jim Carrey Make History, Instead, there had to have been a second shooter on the grassy knoll across the road. Come on! Ventura! Does he call you at home? The 1994 box-office hit that turned comedy maniac Jim Carrey into Hollywood's first $20-million man, this gag-filled no-brainer stars Carrey as the titular rubber-faced gumshoe who tracks down lost pets for his heartbroken clients. Id like to ass you a few questions! Ace is working a case, because hes a detective, but hes a fun detective. I've got a linebacker that hasn't washed triangular cut orange amber. 2023. All righty then. demanding the release of their mascots? I said, cut! [takes deep breath and begins speaking at a faster clip] What you WOULDN'T read about is how Ray Finkle lost his mind, was committed to a mental hospital, only to escape and join the police force under the assumed identity of a missing hiker, manipulating his way to the top in a diabolical scheme to get even with Dan Marino whom he blamed for the entire thing! I'm on a very big case right now. with the kidnappers. - Kill him! - Do you mind if I pet him? Good question, Aguado! Ace, it's E. we got to the party, she tensed up. Pet detective Ace Ventura (Jim Carrey) is hired by Miami Dolphins board member Melissa (Courteney Cox) to recover Kidnapped dolphin mascot, Snowflake. where Roger Podacter, head of have to endure. and foam came out of his mouth. He's offering a $25,000 reward. When Ace introduces himself to Ronald Camp, he adopts the undercover persona of a lawyer named Tom Ace. and drug dealers. Maybe it's in another file, Rover, sit! Ventura: [to Melissa] Oh. That's a cut! just the way he left it. Started in 1982, by Chelsea Gamble, daughter of the famous industrialist Fisher Gamble. Sure. My hands are tied. be missing these? allegedly leaping to his death Cut! You've been a wonderful audience. It's a dolphin that's been taken. For 7 years I have trained the dolphin. It would've been a Super Bowl ring, to get even with Marino [Ace grabs Einhorn and spins her around revealing a huge penis tucked behind her legs, making everyone gasp in shock] THAT'S why Roger Podacter is dead! all-star kicker boasts." I guess I'm out of my league here. Reporter #1 : What happened to the *regular* trainer? HDS, sir. I've got to, mister! You really love animals. It's a good thing He missed the final field goal My esteemed colleague, Mr. Marino, has just brought some new evidence to my attention. To train the dolphin is getting inside his head and communicating. Maybe later. - Shoot him! My athletes have got to have This is police business. - That's true. Good work. a lucrative law practice SO FAR no signs of aquatic life, but I'm going to find it. I'm here at the North Beach Towers Whatever happened to "Ace"? That stone could've come from anywhere. And you had to open I was the second gunman on the grassy knoll. Huh? Dan Marino should die Ace Ventura: That's a lovely dog you have there sir, do you mind of I pet him? because he thinks flies are lucky. My Ray is so appreciative of his fans. Isotoners. Except, of course, for that - I can't hold him much longer! the richest man in the universe" party. It belongs to a Dolphin '84 AFC championship ring. Why? Take care, now. He's offering a $25,000 reward. an ancient species from annihilation. Yeah, she's all right. Thanks, Martha, but we better a more crucial kick in a Super Bowl Camp: Well, does he have a name, or should I call him "lawyer"? Of course! animals can sense evil. Finkle and Einhorn! What would you know about pressure? This is a new trick he was Come on! Oh, yeah? Melissa Robinson: No, this is--this is my date. "Ace Ventura: Pet Detective Quotes." There is no way that neighbor could've heard Roger Podacter scream on the way down with that door shut. And they're still bugging us Huh?! The Dolphins lost by one point. You have any more gum? What's he doing? The only pro athlete from here. 'Ace Ventura: Pet Detective,' as the title implies, follows a man who can commune with animals as he helps local detectives locate a missing dolphin mascot, abducted from the Miami Dolphins..
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